MEMUJI, MEMERLI ATAU MENGUJI?

I always thought that I’m very bad at taking compliments. Be it about my dress, shoes or even my skin. I always reply with something like, “owh, it’s an old dress”, “You know, heels would make you a hag when you’re 30, hence these ugly flats” and “owh, come closer then u’ll see my wide pores!”. Trying to be humble I might say or it might be because I’m so paranoid that I think people always want to GET to me by saying all the nice things I wanna hear, so I talk myself down. Now, THAT might be because when I get home grinning as I think about the compliments, suddenly a voice comes out of nowhere and says “Really?”. Thus from that day forth, I’m going to hate all kinda compliments. I don’t even know which is real and which is not anymore (I get confused. A lot. It happens every time). I am bad at reading between the lines too.

PERLI.. (That’s a big word!) People can be a little bit mean you know. They give you a ‘compliment’ and in like 10 seconds, you’ll be hypnotized and you’ll reveal your deep dark secrets. I’ve been there. Yikes. Trust me, when you get home and you’re alone, that’s when you’ll hear “Really?”. That’s what we call, people-being-sarcastic. Say it! S-A-R-C-A-S-T-I-C. Get used to it. (I’ve been sarcastic to people I don’t like too, well, it’s fun! =) But it’s not fun when people being sarcastic TO you.)

Well, people can be mean because they have this so called ‘confidence’ to be sarcastic to others. However, believe me, we all can be cowards too. That’s why we choose to use sarcasms. We are so afraid of the outcome of being honest. Not many have the guts to say to someone’s face “I’VE SEEN YOU WEAR THIS LIKE EVERYDAY, GIRL. RETIRE IT! COME ON”, “YOU’VE GOTTA PUT SOME INCHES, YOU’RE SHORT, AND THOSE ARE UGLY FLATS!”, “GOSH, YOU HAVE HOLES ON YOUR FACE”. Unless you’re that someone’s best best best friend, or that someone is an angel. (or the fact that you are some kinda daredevil)
So, that covers the ‘menguji’ part. People puji you, but actually, they want to perli you. Haha.

Yeah I know, sometimes the compliments can be genuine too. Alhamdulillah in that case, but be very careful. Puji2 ke langit tu tak akan bawa kita ke mana-mana pun. Tak boleh bawa masuk kubur, ada kemungkinan boleh jadikan kita bubur (in hell. Nauzubillah min zalik.)

When you are 100% positive that people are being sarcastic to you, shut your mouth, do not retaliate because, u know what?, In a while (when you’re not around) they’ll secretly buy everything that you use or wear, the exact same dress, shoes and/or the foundation cream. Now the table turns. (It does. It will. Always.) So, worry not about the sarcasms.

When you’re not sure, don’t talk yourself down because you’ll regret it when the one who says your flats are exquisite are actually wearing 5-inch pointy heels! (ooopsie, you’ve given the heels-would make-you-a-hag-when-you’re 30 speech before she stands up and flash you that pointy heels which you wish with all your heart that she would not shove them down your throat now. Too late!).

To sum up, say “thank you” to all the compliments and ‘compliments’, “Alhamdulillah” dalam hati, and walk away. Laaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaariiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii. =P

Joy & Sorrow

Of all the poemS in Kahlil Gibran's The Prophet, i like this one the most.

Your joy is your sorrow unmasked.
And the selfsame well from which your laughter rises was oftentimes filled with your tears.
And how else can it be?
The deeper that sorrow carves into your being, the more joy you can contain.
Is not the cup that holds your wine the very cup that was burned in the potter's oven?
And is not the lute that soothes your spirit, the very wood that was hollowed with knives?
When you are joyous, look deep into your heart and you shall find it is only that which has given you sorrow that is giving you joy.
When you are sorrowful look again in your heart, and you shall see that in truth you are weeping for that which has been your delight.

Some of you say, "Joy is greater thar sorrow," and others say, "Nay, sorrow is the greater."
But I say unto you, they are inseparable.
Together they come, and when one sits, alone with you at your board, remember that the other is asleep upon your bed.

Verily you are suspended like scales between your sorrow and your joy.
Only when you are empty are you at standstill and balanced.
When the treasure-keeper lifts you to weigh his gold and his silver, needs must your joy or your sorrow rise or fall.

mysterious

i've been on blogger since '06 and da banyak aku tulis before this but i ended up deleting most of the posts and pictures...knapa? lot of reasons...ak pon xtau...bila aku rasa i'm too exposed here then aku padam..bila rasa MALU tu datang, aku padam...i'm not so bold but sometimes i'm i guess tp TAKUT dan MALU tu sentiasa ada... takut TERSALAH cakap, TERLEBIH ckap, wa ghairuha... tau2 ja la...bnyk org gado sebab benda2 alah ni (facebook, blog, wa ghairuha...) erm...xmo la camtu kan..susa nnt aku ni bukan baek sgt...mulut pon boleh tahan...(i'm tryin to keep it down..always am..)
i prefer ppl not knowing too much about me...ppl, kalo da suma benda org tau, apa yg tinggal tuk diri sendiri?, tuk dikongsi ngan husband or wife in the future? rugi la weyh!

there's not much to know bout me actually..i'm living a very regular life (u might call it BORING, but i'd go for REGULAR because i know, ada org yg idopnya laaaagi tak adventurous dr aku...)i remember there was 1 guy who said that i'm MYSTERIOUS...(aku gelak guling2 dowh kol 2 pg time tu...)maybe it was his way of sayin that my life is boring because there was another guy who said ' u r mysterious and u r boring'.
hurm...

i don't know, i'm just trying my best to keep up with ppl but at the same time i don't wanna be too exposed...(I'M NOT MYSTERIOS..HAHA) bagi aku la...tak suma benda boleh dikongsi...

so, KNOW WHEN TO SHUT UP! because certain matters should be private, ppl...

klon

ni suma zana la punya pasal...kalo x xdanya aku nk bukak blog yg da berabuk besawang ni...buat ak bersin ja! actually i never know what i'm supposed to write here..i mean, what do people put on their blogs? what do they write there? uploading pictures, cursing on people they hate, whining on their screwed relationships, complaining about bad days they have...i dont wanna be those people...aku nk blog aku jd cam blog org2 yg bg aku goose bumps bila aku bca...but then, ak pikir balik...'oh c'mon u r not that good awin...!' then aku pon start la tulis...

ye la kalo aku nk jdi cam ko, ko nk jd cam ak, lbey baek aku klonkan dri ak jd ko, n ko klonkan dri ko jd ak...(ha?)

what i'm trying to say here is, everybody is different in their own ways...ada yg normal, ada yg regular, ada yg medium, setengah masak, pelik...mcm2...so stop trying to be someone u r not...be yourself...n be proud of it...

Another meaningful lyric...

Live Your Dreams (All or Nothing)

Here, the chance of life, get ready, set, fly high.
Above the fear of your mind, go for it.
It's hit or miss, too late for you to quit.
You gotta show 'em how bad you really want this, so...

Live your dreams, it's not as hard as it may seem.
You gotta work to get the cream, on your hopes you must lean
From your fears, you have to wean yourself.
It's all or nothing, give your everything...

All what you believe, you got to bring the heat.
Set the pace, competitions take the lead.
This is it, all eyes on you.
So stay on point and prove,
that you deserve whats long overdue.

Live your dreams, it's not as hard as it may seem.
You gotta work to get the cream, on your hopes you must lean
From your fears, you have to wean yourself.
It's all or nothing, give your everything...

My heart is still recovering,
From the heartbreak of another kind,
I'm still drying my tears.
Getting over my own fears in my life.
So I wanna make sure this time that I'm strong enough,
To give it my all...

Live your dreams, it's not as hard as it may seem.
You gotta work to get the cream, on your hopes you must lean
From your fears, you have to wean yourself.
It's all or nothing, give your everything...

So you gotta live your dreams,
So don't you be afraid.
Just set the pace, and take the lead,
It's your time to shine..

-Athena Cage

I broke a heart yesterday...

I could see you’re trying hard to score,
But it’s wrong for you to adore
Me, I’m just ordinary in every way,
So, please don’t wait, don’t stay.

You were asking for a chance
For us together to dance
But I’m sorry…I couldn’t say ‘okay’
I know your heart broke yesterday.

Never meant to hurt,
I know the excuses were absurd,
Never meant to play,
I know I broke your heart yesterday.

Even though I know how u might feel
But I don’t have the power to heal.

You better off without me
I just want you to see
Don’t want you to live in grey
So, I broke your heart yesterday.

Believe me when I say,
It’s even hurt when I try to lay
To broke your heart yesterday
There’s a price for me to pay…

p/s i'm sorry...

time of your life

Another turning point, a fork stuck in the road
Time grabs you by the wrist, directs you where to go
So make the best of this test, and don't ask why
It's not a question, but a lesson learned in time

It's something unpredictable, but in the end it's right.
I hope you had the time of your life.

So take the photographs, and still frames in your mind
Hang it on a shelf in good health and good time
Tattoos of memories and dead skin on trial
For what it's worth it was worth all the while

It's something unpredictable, but in the end it's right.
I hope you had the time of your life.

It's something unpredictable, but in the end it's right.
I hope you had the time of your life.

It's something unpredictable, but in the end it's right.
I hope you had the time of your life

-greenday-